Friday, March 13, 2009

The answer to, "what does a woman really want?"

No, not that. Not that either.

We want flowers! Fresh, delivered, and spontaneous. Don't wait for Mother's Day, and heaven help you if we see the exact same bouquet, sitting on your Mother's coffee table. The simple, spontaneous gesture of sending or bringing a gal flowers for no reason at all will drag your ass out of that doghouse and back doing chores before you can say, "pass me the remote." Oh, and another thing, just because you give a woman flowers don't expect that she owes you, anything! No, not even that.

Just ask Penny Taylor, she's been busy making women, secretaries (oops, administrative assistants) and dead people happy for years. A Master florist, (whatever that means, but it must be good) Penny is the owner of three Blossom Shops, delivering fresh "I screwed up" bouquets from Windsor to Sackville and most recently, Halifax. (Penny has acquired Fenwick Flowers) I was in Penny's Fenwick Street shop this week (don't let the construction stop you) and spotted a gorgeous bunch of snapdragons that would have brightened up my miserable day.

"Snadragons?" he says. Yes, Grasshopper, TSN may be the only channel, but roses are not the only flower.

Not to scare you back to knuckle dragging, but if you really want to complicate things, every flower has a "meaning". I know, just when you were thinking, "how can I screw this up" – you can. Red roses are nice but sending them to your Mom is just creepy. They mean desire. Go for peach, or yellow. And to be safe, I don't know any woman who doesn't like spring flowers. Daffodils mean "you're the only one." (that she knows of). Here's one you'll want to remember – hyacinths mean "Forgive Me", mind you, they are short lived and smell worse than that AXE stuff but if you're in really deep, consider it.

My favourite flowers to receive are well, ANY, but I buy myself tulips whenever I can. Our fridge may not contain food, but the vase on our counter always, always has flowers. Hard to mess up with tulips, and Penny seems to have wooden shoes tucked under her bed as Blossom Shop's tulips are the best I've seen. But basically, guys, any flowers will do. It's truly the thought that counts, unless of course that thought is, "If I give her this, she'll give me that". Don't go there.

With March Break looming, and many families staying close to home next week, it's a perfect time to start racking up brownie points. Having kids at home doing God knows what while you're at work, or running around shops and neighbourhoods can wear on a person's nerves. Jack's been off for a week already and he's lucky I haven't signed him up for the first Bible or Arts & Crafts camp that would take him.

So, one click on the doghouse and you're on your way. Or call Penny at (902) 425-3423 or Toll free: 1-866-798-4043. Penny knows where I live if you'd like to send me some... I'd be really appreciative, if you know what I mean.

Yikes! I just realized it is Friday the 13th! Reverse the karma, start dialing, boys!